Solid relationships are built on trust. So what happens when one of the pair does something that strains — or completely breaks — that trust? If it’s a one-time, never-to-be-repeated event, and the bond is strong, often the offending party receives grace and forgiveness and the relationship continues. But what if there are multiple fibs,…
Tag: Dating after 40
Table manners: Knife and death at dinner
I’ve heard men say that women are too picky about unimportant aspects of a man’s behavior. I think it depends on what one considers important and unimportant. Many women would consider table manners important (or somewhat important). Few of us appreciate a man who chews with his mouth open, talks with his mouth full, licks…
99 men on the wall
Maybe the little ditty “99 men on the wall” will replace the old song we sang loudly on long bus/car drives, but only women will be singing it. Today I have a meet/date with man number 99. It’s taken nearly 5 years to go out with 99 men and I have slowed down a lot…
“You are perfect for me”
I was seduced by these words. They went straight to my heart. Even though the local man’s actions rarely paralleled this sentiment. Even though much of the time I wondered why he didn’t bother to set a time to get together while his text and phone messages talked about how much he missed me and…
Different definitions of “pursue”
Webster’s dictionary says “pursue” means: “seek to form a sexual relationship with (someone) in a persistent way.” I explained in “Tales of woo” how some men’s definition of “pursue” seems skewed to me. Another example has occurred this week. A few weeks ago a local man showed signs of interest. We emailed a few times,…
My next boyfriend will be a bellman!
Arriving home tonight from an 11-day international trip, I lifted my heavy bags into my trunk at the airport. It occurred to me that I’d schlepped these bags more than I cared to when help was not on the horizon. It made me appreciate the cheerful van drivers, bellmen and skycaps who did offer to…
Command presence
For decades (centuries?) women have been drawn to men in uniform. Is it the crispness of their attire that is the allure? The fact that you know they’ve learned responsibility and discipline from being in the service? Some appeal to our desire for a man who knows how to protect us? The respect we have…
The triple-emotional-whammy wedding
Do you get emotional at weddings? Enveloped in the flood of love, joy and hope it is hard not to be. You are caught up in the palpable adoration between the happy couple. Maybe the nuptials remind you of how elated you felt at your wedding(s), immersed in the endorphins from being in love. Or…
The first post-divorce dance
I would never have guessed that one of the most difficult rites of passage after divorce was a first dance with a new man. If you’re like me, you may have slow danced with very few men other than your husband during your marriage (assuming he danced at all), unless you took dancing lessons that…
Should you tell him he’s crossed the line?
In the getting-to-know-you stage, you’re wrong if you tell a man he’s crossed the line and wrong if you don’t. If you do, you can be seen as controlling. If you don’t, you give the impression that whatever he did/said is fine with you. Or you can just disappear and he’ll never know why.
The tingle of possibility
Saturday, the first day of my professional association’s conference this weekend, a married gal pal introduced me to a colleague of hers. He was tall and good looking. We only said hello as we scurried to our sessions. I had reserved a table for 10 for Tuesday night’s gala and invited her to be my…