I was seduced by these words. They went straight to my heart. Even though the local man’s actions rarely paralleled this sentiment. Even though much of the time I wondered why he didn’t bother to set a time to get together while his text and phone messages talked about how much he missed me and…
Dating after 40
Different definitions of “pursue”
Webster’s dictionary says “pursue” means: “seek to form a sexual relationship with (someone) in a persistent way.” I explained in “Tales of woo” how some men’s definition of “pursue” seems skewed to me. Another example has occurred this week. A few weeks ago a local man showed signs of interest. We emailed a few times,…
My next boyfriend will be a bellman!
Arriving home tonight from an 11-day international trip, I lifted my heavy bags into my trunk at the airport. It occurred to me that I’d schlepped these bags more than I cared to when help was not on the horizon. It made me appreciate the cheerful van drivers, bellmen and skycaps who did offer to…
Command presence
For decades (centuries?) women have been drawn to men in uniform. Is it the crispness of their attire that is the allure? The fact that you know they’ve learned responsibility and discipline from being in the service? Some appeal to our desire for a man who knows how to protect us? The respect we have…
The triple-emotional-whammy wedding
Do you get emotional at weddings? Enveloped in the flood of love, joy and hope it is hard not to be. You are caught up in the palpable adoration between the happy couple. Maybe the nuptials remind you of how elated you felt at your wedding(s), immersed in the endorphins from being in love. Or…
The first post-divorce dance
I would never have guessed that one of the most difficult rites of passage after divorce was a first dance with a new man. If you’re like me, you may have slow danced with very few men other than your husband during your marriage (assuming he danced at all), unless you took dancing lessons that…
Should you tell him he’s crossed the line?
In the getting-to-know-you stage, you’re wrong if you tell a man he’s crossed the line and wrong if you don’t. If you do, you can be seen as controlling. If you don’t, you give the impression that whatever he did/said is fine with you. Or you can just disappear and he’ll never know why.
The tingle of possibility
Saturday, the first day of my professional association’s conference this weekend, a married gal pal introduced me to a colleague of hers. He was tall and good looking. We only said hello as we scurried to our sessions. I had reserved a table for 10 for Tuesday night’s gala and invited her to be my…
Musician hits sour note
We’d intermittently flirted by email and phone for almost a year. We lived thousands of miles from each other so promised we’d let the other know when we’d be nearby. He toured in a popular R&B band, but not to my area. Until now. A few months ago he told me his group was booked…
Do you own your wonderfulness?
In A Woman’s Worth, Marianne Williamson says, “No man can convince a woman she’s wonderful, but if she already believes she is, his agreement can resonate and bring her joy.” But how many of us dating in midlife focus on our wonderful qualities? Isn’t it more prevalent to notice your wrinkles, bad habits and other…
Are your conversational habits costing you dates?
I vet potential dates via the phone before meeting. Why? Because if I don’t enjoy the conversation on the phone, it’s pretty much guaranteed I won’t enjoy the face-to-face. I know some people are uncomfortable on the phone, but in this day and age, if you can’t converse comfortably whether on the phone or in…