Do potential suitors leave an impression on you?

After NPR’s Scott Simon ended his interview with actor/singer Terrence Howard, they walked out together. Scott said, “As we were leaving the studio … he grabbed my arm. ‘I touch you, my fingers leave an imprint,’ he explained. ‘The shape of my fingers will disappear. But maybe something I said will live on. Something you said to me will live on.’”

So it is with the potential suitors with whom we share an email, phone conversation, coffee, or more. If we listen carefully and ask thought-provoking questions, their answers may give you insight into relationships, men, or what you want or don’t want. Your questions or answers might do the same for them.

I’ve learned lessons from men I’ve never met, just talked to on the phone, sometimes just once. Some of these conversations have made indelible impressions on me for their insight, wisdom, or astuteness — or sometimes the lack thereof. If we approach every encounter with openness to whatever lesson may be revealed, we live a richer life.

Sometimes the conversations reinforce something we already know. Other times the man tells us volumes about his values and character which either compel us to want to know more, or repel us knowing we aren’t a good match. Even the latter, however, leaves an imprint — a lesson for what to ask in the future.

Be grateful for the imprints others have left on you as there is learning in them all. The wisdom you receive will live on. And know that you may have left a lasting impact on men you’ve encountered.

(Listen to the full interview of Terrence Howard. Mr. Simon says, “I have interviewed thousands of actors over the years. None have been as eloquent, illustrative, or fascinating as Terrence Howard.”)

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