Dreamboat mystery solved

Some readers wanted to know how last night’s dinner date with Dreamboat went. While I don’t often post date reports, I thought I would for this one since Dreamboat has appeared intermittently in this blog for a year. (If you are just joining us, do a find by “Dreamboat” in the search box for the previous postings mentioning him.)

The other day I posed the question “Can you rekindle an attraction you previously felt for a love interest after a year or more?” While I haven’t for any of the other men who’ve reentered my life, there was still a spark with Dreamboat. We laughed and talked and enjoyed ourselves as if we’d just seen each other last week.

I was a bit surprised that he remembered we’d only seen each other three times last year, and could remember details about me and my life. Some of the men I’ve dated have difficulty remembering details during the same conversation, so this was impressive to me!

The reason for his silence for 8 months? He was on assignment out of the country until three weeks ago when his assignment ended. Which is when he emailed me. Why didn’t he tell me he was going to be gone? Because we weren’t seeing each other then, and obviously weren’t in regular conversation. So he thought it silly to call and say, “I’m going to be gone for six months so won’t be taking you out” since we hadn’t dated for the previous five months.

What’s next? We had a frank talk at the end of dinner and we both said we’d like to see each other again. He was up front that the company has offered him two new assignments, one would take him out of the country again for a year, and another would be a lot of travel, but not as much as he did last year. He has a month to decide on the two, find another position within the company, or go to another company. I appreciated that he didn’t withhold this information, as then I could make an informed choice on whether I wanted to see him again, knowing I was pretty drawn to him last time.

We decided to move forward and see what employment options unfold for him in the next month.

By the way, he was as attractive as I remember, but last year he sported a shaved head and this year he has a quarter-inch of hair. So while it’s not much, it took a little getting used to.

Technorati Tags:,,,,,,,, , , , ,

Got a topic on dating after 40 you want Dating Goddess to address? Send your issue to Goddess@DatingGoddess.com.






4 responses to “Dreamboat mystery solved”

  1. Christine Avatar

    Thanks for writing this follow-up! I was very curious how this was going to work out as I always have the inclination to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. (Much to the chagrin of my girlfriends!) I think your result here really points out how important it is not to personalize everything that happens. Like my teenagers tell me, “MOM, it’s not always about you!!” By not getting defensive, or demanding, or difficult, you gave this relationship some potential. Keep us posted!

  2. Geoff Farnsworth Avatar

    I hope Dreamboat meets your requirements and it works out. I’d keep it casual and non-exclusive until he’s clear about his career and where a relationship fits in.
    Good luck, Geoff

  3. kitadiva Avatar

    Good Luck. I hope it all works out for you both.

  4. singlemomseeking Avatar

    Can I just say that I LOVE this post? Your openness, your vulnerability…. Thank you.

    Of course, I have been very curious, too. You really made me laugh here, re: men who have a hard time remembering what was said during the same conversation (oh, I get that!)… and the hair bit at the end. Classic.

    Yes, do keep us posted.