When a man greets you for the first time with “My, my, my,” you know it’s going to be a good date!
Thus began my dinner date last night with guy #82, who we’ll call Mr. Radio Guy since he is the headliner DJ at a R&B station. Even before meeting him, we clicked with our love of R&B. Our online and voice chats were fun, flirty and interesting. He sent me a recording of him on the air since his station is out of state. He’s moving to my area in a few weeks, and was in town to make final arrangements with his new station.
Yes, he has those dulcet tones we discussed in “Are you drawn to deep-voiced men?” It is fun to re-listen to his recording. I realized very few of us get to experience our sweeties at work, watching them perform their jobs superbly. I will soon have ample opportunity to hear him on the air, as well as watch as he emcees concerts with recording stars (and get back-stage passes, too!).
There is something magical about watching — or listening — to someone you are fond of doing a stellar job. My ex was a storyteller, so I regularly watched him perform and beamed as he spun his tales. Then when he became a minister, I enjoyed watching him deliver his sermons (many of which I co-wrote). You see the person in a different light, appreciating a talent you might not have seen before. I delight in watching collegial friends deliver a home-run presentation.
However, when the roles are reversed I find myself a little nervous. When someone I am sweet on sits in my presentation, I’m a tad self-conscious, concerned that he may notice my mistakes. When my ex and I would co-present, we would make notes for each other on what could be improved. While this was helpful, it was also a bit nerve-racking. It was usually easy to identify the things you know you screwed up, and it was hard to hear someone else point them out.
I think one of the keys to having this go well is to make sure you only comment on what you liked, and reserve any suggestions to when — and if — he asks. If he feels you are criticizing him, you’ll never be invited to watch again. So even if you see something egregious, bite your tongue unless he specifically asks for any improvement ideas.
Have you had someone you’re dating experience you at work? Maybe you’ve dated a colleague who attended meetings with you, or a customer? Or have you been able to experience someone you’re dating doing their work? Did that shift your fondness of him?
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