The Tryst

He is smart, funny, charming, good looking, worldly, educated, successful, a sharp dresser, good listener and conversationalist. He tells you what you long to hear. He is vulnerable with you and you with him. His kisses and caresses make you feel what you haven’t felt in a long, long time. He tells you how sexy and adorable you are, and how much he misses being with you.

You met through business, not online, so you know he’s not a player.

Yet there are things about him that on paper would be deal breakers.

10 Tips for Successful Dating Over 40

You’ve been single for a while. You would like to have a special man in your life. But how?

Women reentering the dating scene after a long absence need to first examine if they are ready to date again. After all, not only is there the possibility of being swept off your feet by a romantic, loving man, there’s the chance of being swept over the cliff of heartbreak. Here are some tips on how to ensure you enjoy your adventure of dating after 50, not dread the next coffee date.

When your ex dies

My ex learned he had cancer 2 years ago. Since we didn’t keep in touch, I learned of it a year ago. He did semi-weekly podcasts for a few dozen friends to update them on his health. I listened to the previous 100 podcasts before reaching out via email.

He said he was thrilled to hear from me and was stunned that I would listen to all 100 previous podcasts. I’d asked if now we could be friends and he said he’d like nothing better. We exchanged a few emails and he said he’d like to talk about the end of our marriage as he was sure I had some questions — which I did. I asked for some good times to call since he was so overwhelmed with treatment appointments and recovery. However, he never closed the loop to set up a call, so I decided I’d make the 600 mile trip to visit him and have that discussion face to face. A few months ago, his doctors had given him 18 to 24 months, so there was plenty of time.

Alpha male — or just jerk?

Is seems universal that people find confidence attractive. But at what point does self-assurance cross the line to arrogance and thus become unattractive?

This week I was contacted by a self-described alpha male. These men are typically proud to be dominant, “my way or the highway” kind of guys. They consider compromise wimpy. They often rise to the top of their profession, sometimes by bullying, intimidation and manipulation.

Dating resolutions for 2012

Resolutions are not just declarations of what you wish you could accomplish. They are firm decisions, according to the dictionary. So as we enter 2012, what commitments, pledges and promises do you make to yourself about your dating activities?

Here are mine to get you started:

Do you feel loved at the holidays?

The holidays can feel lonely if you don’t have someone with whom to enjoy the season. No matter what you celebrate — or maybe you don’t celebrate anything — December is filled with reminders to be with loved ones.

What if you really miss having a special someone? You like to snuggle in front of a present-bedecked tree, but you have no one to snuggle. Or you enjoy lighting a menorah with a sweetie. Or maybe you love sharing holiday light viewing while walking hand in hand.

I have two suggestions for getting you through the holidays.

Men, dating and shiny objects

You’ve exchanged a few fun, interesting and engaging emails with a new guy from an online site. Maybe you’ve also had a satisfying phone call or two.

He promises to call again in the next few days. He says he likes talking to you and wants to get together.

Then…

Join special webinar w/DG and Dr. Suzanne Doyle-Morris

Finding and Dating Men Comfortable with a Female Breadwinner

Dec 12m 12:00pm PST/3pm EST, 8pm GMT; 9pm CET
$47/£29

In this frank and lively webinar, two thought leaders will delve straight into the heart of what it means to find and keep love for high-earning professional women.

Dr. Suzanne Doyle-Morris and the Dating Goddess will share what they’ve learned from research, their clients and their personal experiences.

Relationships in the 21st Century often involve gender role reversals with many women being more educated and earning more than their potential mates.  What are the rewards and challenges that face these couples and what should you be looking for from the first date?

In this webinar, you will learn:

Mr. Wong assists in search for Mr. Right

After a long search for your perfect match, you’d welcome help — any help — finding him. You’d do nearly anything to speed up your quest.

Wong Tai Sin

This was my feeling last week when I found myself at Hong Kong’s Wong Tai Sin Temple. It is famed for the many prayers answered: “What you request is what you get” via a practice called kau cim. The temple is named after Wong Tai Sin, believed by some to be a god who walked upon the earth and had amazing power to heal believers.