How are you “wearing” your dating choices?

Jeff T. picYesterday I attended a sculpture showing of the master sculptor Jeff Tritel. Jeff and I went to college together and had lost touch ’til recently. I stumbled upon him and his beautiful work in August at an art festival, then was invited to this weekend’s showing.

Jeff gave me a tour of his recent work, explaining a few favorite pieces. I was mesmerized by his explanation of his art and his creative process. I wish I could have bought many of his pieces, as they are beautiful and the philosophies they symbolize are right up my alley.

Jeff TritelTake “Field of Infinite Possibilities” — a man floats above a field of 3-dimensional shapes, while some similar shapes are imbedded in his body. Jeff says, “Our lives are built on the decisions we make. In this sculpture a man picks shapes from a field. He is constructed of similar kinds of shapes but as they are added to his body, they are changed by the interactions of his previous experiences.”

Wow! Is that cool or what? A sculpture depicting the concept that our choices are embodied in us. I, of course, immediately related this to dating. 🙂 What dating choices do we “wear”? Nearly all of them, if they were more than a passing coffee date. Our choices shape our experience of life.

In fact, some of us wear our choices literally. Every time I am upset, frustrated or disappointed from some dating experience and choose a cookie over a banana, I wear that choice on my hips and thighs. Or when I’m angry at my curent beau and don’t express it appropriately, I can get a pain in my neck, exactly how I perceive my guy.

But there’s more!

In Jeff’s quest to make the piece an even more apt metaphor, he explains, “A removable steel pin allows the man to be placed in different position. The pin allows viewers to change their viewing experience by making their own decision on how the sculpture is to be displayed.”

Wouldn’t it be great if we could so easily choose our “viewing experience,” e.g., perspective, and decide to see the situation from a completely different point of view, especially when the dating encounter has been less than positive? If you owned this sculpture perhaps it would be easier when you came home from a mediocre date to choose the sculpture’s position, thus reminding yourself to change your perspective. Instead of thinking, “That was an hour of my life I’ll never get back,” it would invite you to say, “Let’s see what I learned from that encounter.”

To see Jeff’s work, go to Tell him the Dating Goddess sent you. Hopefully you’ll find something in the catalog you can put in your home to remind you of some important concept.

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One response to “How are you “wearing” your dating choices?”

  1. Christine Avatar

    I think your blog consistently helps to change my “viewing experience” of dating and relationship issues. Admittedly, my feelings of late have been running negative with a lean towards timid, cautious, guarded, distrustful….I know, I know, I’m working on it! In any event, your writing never fails to coax me to consider another, more positive perspective and I think we all appreciate that!