“I want to respect me in the morning”

You know the old ploy of a guy wanting you to sleep with him. He says, “I’ll respect you in the morning.”

But what about you? Will you respect you in the morning if you allow yourself to be seduced?

A while ago, a man I’d dated a few times tried to get me to allow him to stay overnight, promising we’d “just cuddle.” While part of me was tempted, I knew how I’d felt in the past when I’d given in to such requests, as cuddling, even clothed, can easily lead beyond.

So I had the presence of mind to respond, “I’m sure you’d respect me in the morning. But I want to respect me then, too. So we’re not going to spend the night together tonight.”

He couldn’t cajole his way around that, so we went our separate ways that night. And it was true — I did respect myself more for stating my boundary and sticking to it.

What do you need to respect yourself in the morning? Be clear on your limits so when you are tempted to waffle, you hold the line. Think about how you want to feel about you — not how you want him to feel about you — and your choices will be much easier to make.

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2 responses to ““I want to respect me in the morning””

  1. smartie Avatar

    I totally agree with you, men today are just out for one thing… correction MOST men (I do have brothers you know). It’s difficult to be strong but lots of women forget how much power they really have, how much say they really have. We must not give in to the bullying tactics or the overpowering nature of the chilvary-deficient men out there… Then again I was out this weekend and I saw the way women (young and old) carried themselves and it’s no wonder men are behaving badly. I am in my early 20’s and I have to say that THIS is not what I bargained for.

  2. Dating Goddess Avatar


    Thanks for your comment. Yes, I think women forget how much power we have, especially if we like the guy and think that saying no will send him packing. Actually, it often means he will be respectful and attentive.

    When you say “THIS is not what I bargained for” what do you mean?