Using Angel Cards in dating

At the risk of your thinking I’m too woo-woo (I am woo-woo, but balance it with pragmatism), I want to suggest you consider using Angel Cards as part of your dating experience. It is a bit over the top woo-woo to suggest you use them as a predictive tool, but you can use them as a focuser. Let me explain.

Angel Card bookIf you are unfamiliar with Angel Cards, they are 52 small, .75-inch by 2.25-inch cards, each with one or two thought-provoking words and an illustration. There is even a book The Angel Cards Book: Inspirational Messages & Meditations which includes the cards, or you can buy the card pack separately. You can also go online and click to get a virtual card each day.

I’ve used them in dating several ways. First, I’ve pulled a card from the box each morning and noticed how the embodiment of that word showed up for me that day. If I had a date set up for that day, I noticed how that word appeared for me before, during or after the date. Not that the word itself had to be spoken by me or my date, but just my thoughts or observations on the word’s meaning.

I just pulled a card from the deck to give you an example. “Obedience” appeared. “Yuck” was my first response. I’m not fond of being obedient to anyone. And I’m not drawn to someone who’s obedient to me without some independent thought and discussion. So I looked up the definition: “compliance with someone’s wishes or orders or acknowledgment of their authority.” I can get on board with the first part, “compliance with someone’s wishes,” as long as it’s mutual. I think part of what makes a relationship work is the desire to give someone what s/he wants.

So while I don’t have a date today, I use the word pulled from the Angel Card deck to explore my feelings about the word and how it applies to relationships.

The second way I’ve used Angel Cards is to pull a card with the guy I’m dating, assuming he doesn’t think it’s silly. We can then each discuss what the word means to us specific to relationships, or to life. We can notice how the meaning of the word shows up for us that day and discuss it before we say goodnight. It’s a fun way to focus your thoughts on one concept per day.

My most interesting experience with Angel Cards was during the next-to-last mediation session during my divorce. The mediator was a bit woo-woo, which is one of the reasons we chose her. I had been having a terrible time during the mediations, mostly crying during each two-hour session. I felt betrayed with this surprise divorce and my ex’s self-absorption and what I considered selfishness. I was having trouble adjusting to suddenly having the man I thought was my soul mate just a few months before now being my adversary in negotiating the settlement.

Freedom Angel cardWhile my ex was out of the room and she and I were killing time chatting, she pulled out her Angel Card deck and had me pick a card with my eyes closed. Imagine my shock and eventual delight when I pulled the card exclaiming “Freedom.” It immediately hit me that this divorce would give me a freedom I hadn’t had in 20 years. A freedom to do whatever I wanted, to live however and wherever I wanted. Something I hadn’t had during the marriage because I was always considering him in the decisions. Now I was free of that burden. It helped shift my mood and perspective. I still carry that card in my wallet 4 years later to remind me of the gift of that freedom and to remain grateful for it.

So try using the Angel Cards and tell us what you notice. Go to the aforementioned web site if you don’t want to buy the card deck. But try it every day for at least a week and let us know what happens.

Technorati Tags:,,,,,,,, , , , ,

Got a topic on dating after 40 you want Dating Goddess to address? Send your issue to







One response to “Using Angel Cards in dating”

  1. tim Avatar

    When you are alone, I’m sure they can be thought provoking. But with a newish person, I think it’s much more likely to result in exposing unhappy differences. Rather than bring people together, I think it’s more likely to separate them. Of course, if you are into efficiently weeding people out, maybe thats good!