Wing woman

My married BFF has patiently listened to my dating ups and downs for many years. At her suggestion, we decided to attend a well-known church’s fundraiser comprised of an evening of foot-stomping, hip-wiggling music and finger food. She said, “Our kind of men will be there.” Since she is married, I assumed she meant successful, music-loving, charity-supporting men — not married ones!

Upon arrival, we quickly staked out good seats since ours were unassigned. I sat to appreciate our vantage, perched over the middle-aisle exit so we had no one to block our view. She quickly said, “We’re not going to meet any interesting men sitting here.” We were off to enjoy the free wine and hors d’oeuvres.

Since we were bedecked in our holiday attire, we decided we should have a commemorative picture. She looked around for a suitable photographer — preferably a single, tall man. She saw two such subjects chatting nearby and asked if they would accommodate our request for a pic. The taller of the two — a 40-something dimpled baldy — said he’d be happy to. His companion joined in deciding the right angle and lighting.

After clicking two pics — one for insurance — a professional photographer appeared  asking if we wanted a pic with the four of us. “Sure” we said, although we had no idea who these mystery men were. After taking a shot with his camera — which we’d have to buy — I asked if he’d take one with mine. He did. So now we have a lovely photo of the four of us, the two men bookending my BFF and me. In the pic, Mr. Dimple even became chummy and put his arm around my BFF! And he didn’t even know her name!

They chatted for a while, but no one asked for the other’s digits. Oh well.

At intermission, in the foyer we picked up a Chinese takeout box containing two pieces of fried chicken. I grabbed mine as BFF said she needed to go the the ladies room. I tagged along to wash my hands since there was no cutlery available. Noticing no seating in the foyer, I sat on the comfy couch in the ladies room, happily munching my chicken. When my BFF appeared, she said “We aren’t going to meet any men in the ladies room!” and we were off.

We were unsuccessful trolling for suitable suitors, as the foyer was now jam-packed. We enjoyed the rest of the concert and hung out afterwards to nibble on dessert. But alas, no one stepped forward who would be a good prospect to nibble my neck later.

What did I learn? That my BFF was more motivated to help me meet men than I was. And she was better at it! Probably, we decided, because she had nothing to lose. If she was rejected, she didn’t care since she had her hubby waiting at home. She wasn’t looking for someone for herself, but someone for me.

I’m now committed to channeling her boldness and be more outgoing at my next social outing. I suppose one can learn to be one’s own wing man/woman.


Date or WaitAre you ready to be your own wing woman and meet some new men? If so, get your copy of Date or Wait: Are You Ready for Mr. Great? Or gift a copy for a midlife friend.