Some midlife women have shared that they would be interested in dating and finding a sweetie, but they don’t want to do any work to find him. They may — or may not — list themselves on a dating site, but they’re not willing to look at profiles, nor email anyone. If someone approaches her, she may or may not respond.
Some have actually said, “I’d love to have a guy in my life, but he would have to find me at the places I like to hang out.”
This reminded me of an old joke I’m sure you’ve heard.
A woman prays to win the big lottery. She doesn’t and wails at God. The next week the jackpot is bigger, and she prays more, but again doesn’t win. She shakes her fist toward the sky expressing her disappointment and anger. Another week passes, the fund has grown still larger. She prays and prays and prays to win. She does not. In her frustration, she cries and exclaims, “Got why have you forsaken me! I need that money. Why can’t you help me win?”
A voice from on high booms, “You have to buy a lottery ticket.”
Are you “buying” the dating equivalent of a lottery ticket? Are you doing anything to find a guy? Are you online, telling your friends to set you up, going to singles’ dances, or joining singles’ activities clubs? Are you expecting your next love to trip over you at Curves? In the Nordstrom lingerie department? At the Macy’s make up counter? At a beading class? I don’t think a lot of guys frequent these places.
Some women don’t want to vary their routine at all to see if they can meet a guy. Why not take a class on something that interests you but is guy dominated? I once took a class on auto mechanics because I wanted to know more about how my car ran and minor maintenance I could do. There was only one other woman in the class. I didn’t date anyone from the class, but at the time I was going with someone.
I don’t have a recipe for how to find suitable guys. But I do know if you only go to work, Curves, quilting class and stay home watching TV or DVDs, I doubt he’s going to find you. Unless he’s the pizza delivery guy, your mail carrier or the UPS delivery man.
So don’t complain if you don’t win the guy lottery. You have to buy a ticket or not even God can help you.
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