A favorite question to ask

Dr. Phil says we don’t ask the right questions when determining if someone might be a good match for us. I’m sure he’s right. I now have a list of questions I *wish* I’d asked, which I’ll post later.

One of my favorite questions to ask tells me a lot about the man. I explain that I was invited to a Halloween singles’ dance and potluck. The invitation said to come dressed as “your shadow side” — the part of you you’re not proud of having others know about you. You know, things like you’re a slob, couch potato, controlling, etc. I pondered dressing in several costumes, like a judge’s robe because my ex said I was judgmental, or a witch with a big “B” on my chest because… well you know why. Before I tell him what I finally decided on, I ask what were things he’d consider.

His response tells me a lot. If he can’t think of anything he’s not proud of, it tells me he’s not very introspective. We all have things we want to change. If he comes up with things like “Superman,” he’s not clear on the concept of “shadow side.”

Even if he doesn’t come up with something immediately, his reaction to the question and discussion around this tell me a lot.

What question could you ask that tells you a lot?

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One response to “A favorite question to ask”

  1. Ellie Avatar

    What a great blog. The last blog I looked at (on Craigslist I think) was unitelligible, hard to read and follow and offered nothing but gibberish. Yours is the opposite of all that. You are such a great writer, and if I can’t talk with you, I can always get my Goddess fix by reading your blog. It’s wonderful. Really!! Thank you!xxxxoo Ellie