A tale of two phone calls

Yesterday I had a first phone call with a potential date. While his profile was refreshing and intriguing, the conversation was strained. I tried to pull him out by asking questions related to his profile comments. Although he’d initiated contact with me within 24 hours of the call, he asked me nothing about my profile comments, and only asked me one question. He suggested coffee, but I begged off as I didn’t feel drawn to invest an hour or two to meet.

However, today, I had a long conversation with another gentleman. We talked about important lessons from relationships and what we are each looking for. He asked incisive questions and shared his experiences. Soon an hour had whizzed by. We set a dinner date for later this week.

What was the difference? It should be pretty clear from the above. The first guy didn’t make it easy to converse. He didn’t ask me but one question, so I felt like it was a “blind” call even though he’d make the initial contact. The second one asked important questions and shared his perspective, even when it wasn’t the same as mine. The second one won the date!