Most of the people I talk to about dating want to find “The One” quickly and get the dating roller coaster ride over. They don’t enjoy the process of meeting new people and being disappointed when there isn’t mutual attraction. Or if there is, it doesn’t last long.
One 60-plus woman friend who recently found herself single after a 20+ year relationship ended, shared that she didn’t expect to be unattached within a year or so. However, her plan for finding her next mate mostly relies upon him finding her. She wasn’t really interested in putting much effort into it and was definitely not interested in going online. She’s attractive, but not a stunning beauty, and isn’t well-off financially. She also has some pronounced personality flaws that drove away her last long-time love.
A male friend expressed that he can’t wait to settle on the many women aggressively pursuing him. He hasn’t been dating long, but is already tired of it. He wants the quest to be over so he can devote his energy to other things.
Both these people see dating as somewhat of a chore. There’s no interest in seeing dating as a way to better learn what you want as well as meet interesting people. Their attitudes are best summed up with Ashleigh Brilliant’s cartoon above.
What about you? How do you see your dating life? Is it a chore or an interesting journey? What advice would you give others who are wanting to rush the process and settle on the first person who meets their minimum criteria, just so they can stop the dating game?
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