A man contacted me whose online name is the equivalent of Wuss4U. I laughed, as I thought it must be a joke. I read his profile:
“I seek an aggressive woman who wants to take charge and call the shots. I am meek and mild, shy. I need a strong, forceful woman to dominate me. Tell me where to go and what to do. I will do as you say without any back talk or lip. Age, height, weight are not important. If you are interested, please wink or email me as I am probably too timid to approach you first. I am hoping for a LTR or marriage.
“It would be fun just to be with you. You pick the movie. You control the TV remote. You choose the restaurant. Just let me bask in your presence and serve your desires. Where would you like to go? I will be happy to go with you and look after you needs.
“My favorite thing is treating you like a princess. Your pleasure and delight is most important to me.”
Is this a joke? (I realize there is a whole subculture for those interested in dominance/submission. Those people are usually listed on specialized sites, not mainstream ones.) For discussion sake, let’s assume he’s serious and not just kinky.
Some men think women want a man to cater to her every whim. To kowtow to her. To be subservient. I know few — if any — women who desire this. This man has taken to extreme a woman’s desire to be appreciated and receive attention, and yes, get what she wants equally with doing what he wants. We all desire someone who pays attention to what we like and works to give that to us. It works both ways.
Control issues can be a problem, no matter the gender. What about give-up-control issues? Would you like to be with someone who only cared about what you wanted? Only did what you wanted? On one level it would seem perfect — at least for those who really only want someone to accompany them on their desired outings.
Part of the allure of having a relationship is seeing life from another’s perspective, experiencing what gives them joy, and perhaps expanding your own horizons. I know I’ve enjoyed this part of dating. I like it when men take me into a world I wouldn’t have sought to discover on my own. Sometimes I’ve liked the new experience; sometimes I’ve said, “Once was enough.”
So how would you like being with Wuss4U? Would that be your idea of nirvana or hell?
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