Some people feel it is important to discover if you are sexually compatible before investing a lot of time developing a relationship with someone. Others feel that sex is something that should happen after a firm foundation of trust and caring has been developed. If you are in the first camp, then your first time…
Are you ready for Mr. Great?
Get back on the horse that threw you
After a distasteful or painful dating experience, it’s tempting to stop dating for a while. In fact, some people find a heartbreaking experience so odious that they swear off dating for years. While it’s a good idea to take a break to heal your wounds, if you go too long you lose your rhythm. You…
The choice: Break up or spend the weekend together
My friend shared his dilemma and his choice. A woman he’d seen a few times wanted to drive 2.5 hours from her home to see him. While he thought she had many wonderful characteristics, he knew they were not a long-term match. He said, “I knew I had to break up with her then on…
Managing disappointments
Dating can take an emotional toll. You get your hopes up when it seems someone is a great match. Even when you try to manage them, expectations creep in. You start having hopes, perhaps fantasizing about a future together. Then something happens that dashes it all. A deal breaker emerges. A total impasse. Something one…
“There must be a pony in here”
“Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” Winston Churchill People who know my dating philosophy and/or read this blog sometimes ask how I can stay so upbeat in the face of so many encounters that haven’t panned out. I admit that while to some it can sound exciting to have gone…
Love me tender
In Elvis‘ song, he says, “Love me tender, love me sweet, never let me go.” Doesn’t that say a lot? Love me tenderly and sweetly. And when you do, I don’t want you ever to let me go. I want that tenderness and sweetness to last forever. The dictionary defines tender as “showing gentleness and…
“I want to court you”
These words are heart melting to a woman who wants love, romance, and a long-term relationship. No other man had said these to me. They were voiced after two weeks of nightly talking for hours about things that were important to each of us. What broke up past relationships, what was important to each of…
The deliciousness of pillow talk
There’s something delicious about late-night calls with your sweetheart. They are even more yummy than a mint on your pillow, and I love chocolate! When snuggled in bed talking on the phone the conversation seems to get deeper, more tender, and of course, sometimes provocative! This virtual tucking in can bring you closer as long…
Do you have time to wait to open your heart?
A friend of mine died this week. I don’t know if I’ll ever become accustomed to people dying, especially when someone succumbs unexpectedly, as he did. When someone passes it prompts us to reflect on what’s important. Loved ones always appear at the top of that list. We become more appreciative of the gifts around…
Dating as therapy
Dating books say that dating shouldn’t be used as therapy. In other words, you shouldn’t use your guy to be your sounding board and work through issues as you would with a therapist. In fact, even if he is a therapist — especially if he is a therapist — you shouldn’t expect him to act…
Are you a happy dater?
The other day one of my dearest friends Ellie, asked me how I managed to stay so happy. It’s true that generally I’m a perpetually perky person, but I do have my bouts with unhappiness when faced with setbacks and disappointments. I’ve worked hard to reduce the time I spend in a dreary mood when…