Do men want feisty women?

Apolo Anton OhnoI’ve recently become addicted to “Dancing with the Stars.” I know, I’m slow to join the onslaught of rabid fans. What pushed me over the top was Apolo Anton Ohno. What a luscious man! Although he’s only 24, one can still drool, yes? I got so enamored, I spent the evening watching this season’s previous DWTS shows at

Leila AliWatching so many shows at once I noticed a theme emerge in the behind-the-scenes interviews with the dancers. The women, at least the ones who have stayed in the game, all are strong, confident, and feisty. No surprise here for this highly-competitive sport. But the woman who stands out for me is Leila Ali, who as a boxing champion one would expect to be strong willed and gutsy. But she mixes it with a sensuality, gracefulness, and allure that have many men’s mouths on the floor.

Since many (most?) of my dating gal pals are also spirited, self-assured and spunky, it made me wonder if this was a guy magnet or repellent. While many men are drawn to Leila’s beauty and sexuality, is their infatuation only in fantasy form? Or would they actually be drawn to women like that in real life? Since Leila is engaged, she’s obviously found a man who likes her mixture of strength and sensuality.

Many men are intimidated by feisty women. And as more women have made our way on our own, either through divorce, widowhood, or life-long singledom, we’ve had to be strong to survive. Sometimes that strength overrides softness or femininity. We forget how to be sensual. Leila is a great role model for how to exude the perfect balance.

Feisty WomenMy friend Ava Diamond wrote a powerful book called Great Quotes from Feisty Women. She says, “A feisty woman is vibrant, gusty, lives boldly, is true to herself, and embraces her power as a woman.” Does this sound like you?

What do you think about feisty women and dating? Is it easier or harder for them?

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7 responses to “Do men want feisty women?”

  1. Jenny Avatar

    WOW! I think because we are fiesty, we might intimidate the men! Just my experience 🙂 Fiesty is GOOD if you can get past the intimidation part 🙂

  2. Bookyone Avatar

    Hi DG,

    Wow, great question. IMHO, yes, secure men do prefer feisty women, as most of my married girlfriends are all pretty feisty. Of course there are those insecure guys who can’t handle being around feisty women, but IMHO that is their problem.

    I wish there was a crash course on being feisty, I could definitely use some help in this area.

    Best wishes from bookyone 🙂

  3. Dick Masterson Avatar

    No. We want a woman who doesn’t embarrass us with the chiming frequency of a grandfather clock.


  4. Bookyone Avatar

    Hi Dick,

    You either have a very warped sense of humor or your name suits you to a tee.

  5. lulu Avatar

    What feisty woman would want to be with an man who couldn’t hang?

  6. TJ Avatar

    I am very attracted to feisty women. If they’re not mean, disrespectful and bitchy. There’s a big difference between a feisty, snappy, bitchy woman and a feisty, confident, compassionate and reasonable woman. The “secure” man thing is hogwash. It has much more to do with respecting yourself. If you’re being abused by a fesity bitchy person, then men will run run run run run. If you’re fesity and nice? Let’s chat…

  7. […] “Do men want feisty women?” I heard that many men like spirited, strong women. When I bounced off the book’s […]