Some women play hard to get on purpose. Some just end up being hard to get because of circumstances.
What if a man asked you out 28 times before you said yes? He’s not a creep, nor a stalker, but someone who’s genuinely interested in you. He’s kinda cute, nice and pleasant, but you have a boyfriend who you’re not getting along well with. And this guy sent you a dozen roses before you finally accept coffee with him.
I was having dinner with my friend Shawna Schuh and her charming, delightful husband Don Potesta. We were talking about how they met and the above story emerged. But the story gets even better.
Over coffee, he revealed three things which were deal breakers for her. After a short while, she was done and said, “I’m leaving. It was great to meet you. Good luck.” To which he responded, “No problem. I only date women for two weeks anyway.”
This piqued Shawna’s highly competitive nature. She said she would accept his dinner invitation because she was so sure he would be unable to resist dating her for longer then 2 weeks. Much longer. And sure enough, she was right. They’ve been married 19 years.
And Don continued his wooing her. Every week he sent her a dozen roses to work — for sixteen weeks. And every time he showed up to take her out he brought a single red rose. This man knew what he wanted and how to win her.
Many of us would have blown off a guy who was so persistent. Maybe we would think he was arrogant, clueless, or desperate. Or the aforementioned creepy. But Shawna knew he wasn’t any of these, and even with three apparent deal breakers she saw his clear interest in her and she gave him a chance. And is she ever glad she did.
How hard do you make it for a guy to date you? It is hard to determine where you should be on the continuum of being too eager to say yes and being too hard to get. While men typically like a challenge, most would give up after being told no 28 times. Where do you put yourself on this continuum?
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