Spending six days over the holiday with a two-decade-married couple gave me ample opportunity to watch their relationship up close for days on end. Usually when we visit friends or relatives we spend from several hours to a few days with them. When others are around, most of us are on our best behavior. Only…
Tag: dating over 40 advice
Belief in a wreath
I recently read about a Lithuanian summer solstice ritual where at midnight unmarried women toss leaf and flower wreaths into rivers. The belief is that their wreath will be pulled out downriver by the man of their dreams. Were it this easy to telegraph to the man of our dreams that we are available and…
Treasures can come in dented packages
If you received a gift in a Tiffany’s box but the corner was mushed, would you be unhappy? If you were given a 2-pound box of your favorite Godiva with the top indented, would you be disappointed? No, of course not. Because you know it’s what’s inside that really matters, not the packaging. Many midlife…
The power of appreciation in dating
Many years ago I heard a speaker state that 95% of communication in a romantic relationship should be acknowledgment. In other words, most of what you say to each other should be positive, complimentary and affirmative of the other. This made me look at my own communication with my then husband. I didn’t track the…
You can tell a lot by your date’s … driving
I don’t recommend you get in a date’s car until you’ve gone out with him at least three or four times. But when you do, notice how he drives. It will tell you a lot about his personality. Here’s my take on driving habits and what they can tell you. Tailgates — He’s impatient and…
Knight and day
How many women have said they want a “knight in shining armor”? Well, I found one. Literally. His after-work life involves teaching historical swordplay and leather craft. He often gives dueling demonstrations at Renaissance faires. He introduced himself by email the other day. (I wonder if it’s hard to type while wearing metal gloves. Maybe…
Yummy is as yummy does
When my friends ask if a particular man I’m seeing is handsome, I commonly respond, “If I saw him from across the room, I wouldn’t say ‘Who’s that yummy guy?’ But the more I’m with him, the yummier he gets.” Men seem to become cuter as their personalities emerge. A man who isn’t George Clooney…
Shopping for men
Dating life can be brutal. You make an effort to look nice (I call it getting “dated up”) to meet someone new, then he either doesn’t contact you afterwards, tells you he’s not attracted to you or there’s none of that elusive “chemistry.” You have to have perseverance and hope that someone for you is…