I’ve discovered a key relationship test. This one is guaranteed to tell you what you need to know about your guy, so I recommend using this test early in the relationship to decide if you want to keep seeing him or not.
What is the test?
Picking a DVD together at Blockbuster.
Why is this such a good test?
You will see not only if he only wants to see gory, action flicks and if he has any tolerance whatsoever for romantic comedy or chick flicks. I know, I know, I’m stereotyping. But you get my
point — you see how comparable your tastes in movies are, and more. Maybe you like indy films and he only likes sophomoric pics. Is he open to seeing a movie you like, even though he doesn’t regularly watch that type? And if he insists on seeing “Saw” even though you tell him you hate scary movies, he’s not listening to you.
How do you negotiate? What if you have a difficult time finding something you both want to see? This process will tell you a lot — a very lot — about the guy you’re going out with. I’ve learned this process tells you quite a bit about your guy.
My sweetie tells me that when a man agrees to watch a chick flick he’s really just hoping he’ll get lucky after the flick is over. Are we surprised?
Try it and tell me how it works for you. (BTW, we ended up today with “The Holiday.”)
Technorati Tags: dating Internet, dating online, senior dating, bbw dating, mature dating, dating over 50, dating over 40, online dating advice, dating after 40, dating after 50, over 40 dating,40+ dating, dating after forty
Got a topic on dating after 40 you want Dating Goddess to address? Send your issue to Goddess@DatingGoddess.com.
Comments
4 responses to “The date relationship test”
Well…. I actually like chick flicks. And I usually do not like action movies. And the test works in reverse. So do not just go once, but go a few times – giving each other a (subtle, hidden) bias – to see if there is some reciprocity.
Often times there is not mutual sharing as the “man’s choice” is deemed less appropriate and the woman’s choice is deemed more artistic. And then – often – the middle ground is missed because of “score keeping” or conflict.
I happen to like arty movies – and many chick flicks are in or close to that genre – but that is just my opinion.
Then there was the first movie date with the LTR a while back. She chose the Jackie Chan movie. I actually like his action movies – but not many others.
You offer good tests – they should be thought of in a more reciprocal light…
With the ex I saw more Arnold Schwarzenegger films than I ever thought I would in this lifetime (I thought it would be zero, it ended up being most of them…). Also lots of Aliens, Predators, and a lot of other heavy duty yuckies. Things blew up on the screen a lot, it was tiresome.
Anything I liked (musicals, Jane Austen films, indies, etc.) was perfectly fine to watch…alone on evenings when he was visiting his friends. Any suggestion of reciprocal watching induced verbal violence, door slamming and general bad feeling. I gave up trying.
And now? Many of my favourite films have been seen and appreciated. And any man who can quote whole scenes from Pride and Prejudice is more than OK in my book!
Hi Goddess,
Regarding the comment:
“My sweetie tells me that when a man agrees to watch a chick flick he’s really just hoping he’ll get lucky after the flick is over. Are we surprised?”
That is an interesting generalization. It may tell you a lot about your “sweetie” and it doesn’t say much about men. The term chick flick is also a generalization, as if only “chicks” could relate to it. I suggest that all men are not “hoping to get lucky” and are actually interested in the movies, what their partners enjoy, learning about their partners and exploring their feminine. And no, I’m not some airy fairy guy. I’m a mature, responsible, well integrated former U.S. Marine Sgt, who is into physical fitness, my faith, guns, gold, good and great books and movies (try “The Quiet Man” sometime), and into really knowing and truly loving my lady. She, by the way, enjoys scary movies (I do not) and action flicks and for her . . . the more gore the better!
A fella told me once, “All Indians walk single file. I know, because I saw one the other day and that was the way she was walking.”
Generalizations? No thanks. You recommend an interesting process though I will try it without the editorial comments. I hope that you “get lucky”
Best regards,
Ray
What if he picks movies that he thinks you’ll like, and you always like them, but you argue about a bunch of other stuff because he is stubborn?