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Ambivalence

Posted on June 9, 2006 by Dating Goddess

Ambivalence is the bane of the dating world. I’ve had plenty of pleasant dates with guys who were smart, educated, successful, attractive yet I felt if I saw him again, fine; if not, fine. I debated with myself whether I’d accept a second date or not.

On the one hand, there was nothing odious or off-putting, so why not spend a little more time together and see if a spark gets lit? We can all have off days, so why not take the risk of investing a little more time? If nothing develops after the second date, time to cut each other lose and move on.

On the other hand, if I didn’t find him scintillating in our first encounter, why waste both our time? You have plenty of other things on your calendar, so investing a little more time means you’d have to give up something else.

What to do?

Two options come to mind. 1) You can invest a little more time on the phone and see if you’re drawn to get together. Or 2), you could get together for coffee or something with a short time investment. If no spark, then move on. But maybe by giving him a second chance, the spark will be kindled.

Category: Are you ready for Mr. Great?, Dating chemistry, First-rate first dates
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