Yesterday, the Washington Post ran a fun article reviewing the new movie on older dating: “Cast of the Gray-Hot Lovers In ‘Boynton Beach,’ a New Wrinkle on a Mature Subject.” While you have to register to get free access to the article, it’s worth a read, and sounds like the movie is worth watching. It has a stellar cast, including Dyan Cannon, Michael Nouri, Sally Kellerman, Len Cariou and Joseph Bologna.
The movie shows some of the things that have been discussed in this blog: the angst of getting naked for the first time with a romantic partner, the tentativeness of first encounters, the joys of having a cuddle partner and more. It sounds like the subject is handled with humor and tenderness.
So what are the differences dating over 60 vs. dating from 40-60? What stands out for you?
In the 40-60 age range there aren’t as many people who’ve suffered the death of a spouse. Also, if we’re concerned about our bodies not being as great as when we were in our 20s, the 60+ group seems to have even more issues with this. Fundamentally, however, starting dating again and entering into romantic relationships has some of the same excitement and fears, although we certainly know more about what we want the older we get.
If you see the movie, come back here and write your review.
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Comments
6 responses to “Boynton Beach Club shows older-dating joys and trials”
Hey Dating Goddess,
I went to Dallas to visit my best friend this past weekend in hope of hooking up with an old flame. We have been talking for over a month now via emails. However, he is still the same person that I dumped about 7 years ago. With the exception that he dresses better now. So anyway, I kept thinking about a phrase from Rachel Sarah’s book, “Don’t go back for more when there is less”. This trip kinda answered all of my what-ifs with this ex. He is not my match.
So anyway, I was surfing match.com and saw so many eligible bachelors out there. Some of them are very educated and good looking as well. I wonder why can’t they find their match? And also, it kinda gives me hope that there are still many fishes in the sea.
Janet
Regarding Janet’s comments, I’ve been wondering the same thing myself, in terms of why so many great bachelors are still out there. Yesterday, out of curiosity, I put in my old zip code on Match.com just to see who would pop up. Guess what I found, many of the very same profiles and same photos of guys I had met or emailed with three to four years ago!!! It wouldn’t have been surprising to see one or two familiar faces but there were several. What’s up with that?
I dated a guy who had been on the dating site for 2 years, and still hadn’t met his perfect match (I wasn’t it either!). Do you thing people get jaded if they don’t meet someone nice in a short while, and then they get over-picky? Hard to say…
Are the more discerning people (educated, handsome, as you say) afraid that if they pick someone then they will miss the “real” one, so they seek, seek, seek?
Maybe the more simple folk just find someone who looks OK, smells all right (or not), and is pleasant enough and just stop there.
It’s a mystery to me as well…
Having been on Match myself for 2 years, I’ve found the same thing — the same guys keep coming up in my matches. I think there are several things going on.
1) Even if they are dating someone regularly, they may not pull their profile down. Why? Sometimes it is forgetfulness, sometimes laziness, sometimes they don’t get many women writing to them and if someone does, he tells her he’s dating someone.
2) Sometimes they aren’t ready to date. I can’t tell you the number of guys who have contacted me, we’ve emailed a few times, given me their phone number, I call and never hear back.
3) They like dating around or are overly picky. One guy wrote in his profile that you shouldn’t respond if you were over a size 4!
4) Just because their picture is handsome, remember that could be a 10 — or 20! — year-old pic. And just because they are educated and articulate doesn’t mean they are socially adept or emotionally stable. The crazy psychiatrist was a perfect example of that.
5) Or, like me, they just haven’t found the right one yet.
Goddess,
What is the story behind the crazy psychiatrist?
You are right… just because they are educated and articulate on their profiles doesn’t necessarily means that they are the same in person. And pictures can be deceiving as well…
Janet:
I referred to him in “Dating as therapy” http://datinggoddess.wordpress.com/2006/11/07/dating-as-therapy
I guess I’ll have to write a posting about him to tell the whole story, although that tells you a lot.