Skip to content

Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40™

Dating-over-40 advice by the Dating Goddess™

Menu
  • Get your free eBook now!
    • You’ve Got to Kiss a Lot of … Princes
  • Books
    • Date or Wait: Are You Ready for Mr. Great?
    • Assessing Your Assets: Why You’re a Great Catch
    • In Search of King Charming: Who Do I Want to Share My Throne?
    • Embracing Midlife Men: Insights Into Curious Behaviors
    • Dipping Your Toe in the Dating Pool: Dive In Without Belly Flopping
    • Winning at the Online Dating Game: Stack the Deck in Your Favor
    • Check Him Out Before Going Out: Avoiding Dud Dates
    • First-Rate First Dates: Increasing the Chances of a Second Date
    • Multidating Responsibly: Play the Field Without Being a Player
    • Real Deal or Faux Beau: Should You Keep Seeing Him?
    • Moving On Gracefully: Break Up Without Heartache
    • From Fear to Frolic: Getting Naked Without Getting Embarrassed
    • Ironing Out Dating Wrinkles: Work Through Challenges Without Getting Steamed
    • You’ve Got to Kiss a Lot of … Princes! A Sampling of Midlife Dating Lessons, Stories and Insights
    • Attract Your Next Great Mate: Dating Advice From Top Relationship Experts
  • Cart
Menu

Dipping into salsa

Posted on June 5, 2011June 6, 2011 by Dating Goddess

Salsa — a spicy dip and a spicy dance. My latest experience is with the latter.

Dr. Philling myself, I asked how online dating was working for me. I’ve met some interesting men and gathered a few sweethearts from the experience, but know there are other options. Yet, being situationally introverted, I’m not great about getting myself to in-person singles events.

Like many midlife daters, I want to maximize my ability to meet intriguing singles. So I’ve been pep-talking myself into more in-person activities. Doubting I’ll meet anyone in my 99% all-women Jazzercise classes, I’ve expanded my reach — and my comfort zone.

So this weekend I convinced a gal pal to accompany me to a salsa dance class. Arriving 10 minutes before class time we were surprised we were the only ones there. “Cool,” we muttered to each other, “abundant attention from the male instructor.” Then three men swept in — we were surprised we were now in the minority.

Eventually, there were 8 couples including one other male instructor who patiently muttered the steps as each woman took turns in his arms. The instructor did a great job of having us change partners every few minutes so we got to practice not stepping on each other’s toes with multiple novices.

The instructor, a mid-life, pot-bellied man with a comb over was surprisingly sensual when he got his hips going. If men knew how alluring a good dancer is, I think more would take up ballroom dancing.

Even though I had lessons many years ago, I knew it would be best to start from scratch. So when the instructor asked about our experience, I said to assume I knew nothing. I was then pleased when he singled me out to compliment my turns.

Did I meet anyone I thought I’d want to date? No. But I did feel comfortable in the environment which made me want to return. After a few more lessons, I’d feel comfortable attending one of their salsa dance parties and expanding my social circle.

The experience reminded me of the process of dating. At first it feels awkward and uncomfortable. But with a little guidance and practice, you feel more secure. Within a short amount of time, you’re ready for more and looking forward to new experiences.

What have you tried that is like dating — you’re timid at first but then quickly get comfortable?

______________________

Want more ideas of what to expect as you begin to date again? Get your autographed or electronic copy of Date or Wait: Are You Ready for Mr. Great?

Category: Dating after 40

Get your FREE eBook

You’ve Got to Kiss a Lot of … Princes

78 pages on navigating midlife dating — plus DG’s postings delivered to your inbox.

Sign up now

About the Dating Goddess

After her 20-year marriage dissolved, the Dating Goddess dated 91 men in 3.5 years. She shares her lessons, stories and advice for midlife women reentering the dating scene.

Dating Goddess Books

The Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40 series — 13 books for dating again in midlife.

See all 13 books »

eBooks $9.95, soft cover $19.95
Save 20% on 3–6 eBooks
30% on 7–12
40% on all 13
— plus the bonus eBook Attract Your Next Great Mate

Recent Posts

  • Dinner and Dalliance
  • The Tryst
  • The Goatherd and the Goddess
  • Keeping it 100
  • Appreciating Who He Is Over What He Is
  • “You Do You”
  • What’s Your “Need for Affiliation”?

Write to the Goddess

Email the Dating Goddess

© 2026 Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40™ | Powered by Minimalist Blog WordPress Theme