In “Understanding the stage your guy is in” I told you about Alison Armstrong’s study of what makes men tick and her subsequent “Celebrating Men, Satisfying Women®” workshops. I attended the free introductory program and not only confirmed some of what I’d learned on my own, but got some refinements and new information as well….
Dating chemistry
Why are we drawn to bad boys?
They are like forbidden foods when we are on a diet. They pull us toward them, no matter how much self-control we try to have. We work to resist, but their beckoning becomes too much for us. We succumb to their wiles. What is it about bad boys — who are, of course, really midlife…
Looking for a connection
“I’ve had a lot of sex in my life. I’m looking for a connection. Sex is an important element in a long-term relationship, but it’s not the only important thing.” My jaw was agape as I heard him share his philosophy. I admit it. I’ve come to expect the polar opposite from midlife men in…
Advice from sister-surrogate sages
Having lunch with two friends, both 16 years my senior, we were discussing relationships. They asked about my love life, always wanting an update on the soap opera of my dating situation. One had been married nearly 50 years, the other was a divorcée from a 30-year marriage. I often bounced my relationship dilemmas off…
The faux vacation fling
You had an instant, magical, mutual connection. On the first date you both expressed how attracted you were to the other, and how much you enjoyed your time together. He kissed you on the cheek during dinner, showing that he was a gentleman — not assuming privileges too soon. After dinner, neither of you wanted…
Are you open to receiving?
Do you think of yourself as feminine? When I hear that word, I think of the terms usually used to define the word: delicacy, prettiness, sensitivity, gentleness, compassion. I conjure up an image of a demure, eyelash-batting, quiet girl/woman wearing pink lace and crinolines. A la Melanie Hamilton, Scarlet’s rival in “Gone With the Wind.”…
Are you “skin hungry”?
A friend used this term to describe when someone longs for touch. She said it means someone hasn’t been touched in a while, or perhaps as much as they like. Maybe their friends or family aren’t the touching type. They crave human contact — literally. But especially opposite-sex contact, even if it’s just holding hands…
Kisses do tell
Women place more emphasis on the first kiss than men do. We use it as part of determining if we want to see the man again or not. University at Albany researchers Susan M. Hughes, Marissa A. Harrison, and Gordon G. Gallup, Jr. recently published their findings on kissing in an Evolutionary Psychology article. This…
Guys: Need your help translating
Gentleman readers: On behalf of my women readers, I want to offer my last date as a case study. I need your help translating this message. Yesterday’s posting talked about that date, which by my assessment went well. Not the best first date, but good. Here’s Mr. New Guy’s response to my thank-you email: Last…
Flower power
If you’ve read Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40 for long, you will know I am an incurable romantic. In fact, my YahooPersonals “love profile” assessment labeled me as “Romantic,” which it describes as: You want and expect it all —- a lasting connection with someone on every level —- mental, emotional, sexual, and spiritual….
Acknowledge the good stuff
In May, I wrote about my friend Mike Robbins’ work using appreciation to deepen relationships at work and home. (See “The power of appreciation in dating.”) His book, Focus on the Good Stuff: The Power of Appreciation, is finally published, and he’s doing a special drive to get on Amazon’s bestseller list tomorrow. If you…