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I want to date his family

Posted on June 1, 2011May 31, 2011 by Dating Goddess

It’s a bit awkward when someone you’re newly getting to know invites you to a casual family event and you end up hitting it off with his family much more than you do with him!

This happened to me this weekend. My new activity partner (AP) and I had agreed to see a movie. He called at noon to see if I’d like to have a bite to eat beforehand. “Sure” I responded. Then he added, “We’ll go to my brother’s for a BBQ, then we can go to the movie.”

“Hmmm” I thought. “We’re only activity partners, not really dating, and we’ve only seen each other 3 times before. It’s kinda early to be meeting his family. But what the heck, maybe it’s a party and I’m his plus one.”

It was not a party. It was just the four of us.

I hit it off immediately with his brother and sister-in-law. Especially the brother. He was tall, good looking, smart, funny and closer to my age and temperament than my activity partner. But he was married. How I wished he wasn’t — I’d be flirting up a storm.

His sister-in-law was sweet. But the contrast between the two of them and my AP was jarring. He is a sweet man, but he repeats himself and only talks about what he did on his job — from which he retired 8 years ago.

By the end of the afternoon, I restrained myself from suggesting we all go to a movie together. Asking for a second “date” seemed presumptive. So we’ll see if my AP comes up with this on his own.

Have you experienced liking your date’s friends or family better than him? Tell us your story.
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Are there signs you should move a man into the activity partner or friend zone? Find out in Real Deal or Faux Beau: Should You Keep Seeing Him?

Category: Dating after 40

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After her 20-year marriage dissolved, the Dating Goddess dated 91 men in 3.5 years. She shares her lessons, stories and advice for midlife women reentering the dating scene.

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