dating over 40

Junk in the trunk. Flat. Round. Taut. Soft. Sagging. Dimpled. Some have shelves on the top, others underneath. You could bounce a quarter off a few. So many sizes and shapes.

Songs have been written about buns. “Baby’s got back” is a high compliment in some circles.

People can be derrière devotees. Caboose connoisseurs. Ass aficionados.

My 55-year-old successful gal pal was recounting her 5-year dating experience. She bemoaned her encounters with men who were not comparable economically or emotionally. It is a common lament for successful midlife women. The wail is, “Where are the men like us?”

Have you considered how much testosterone impacts our dating lives? And for that matter, our lives in general? Since both men and women have testosterone, I was interested in Public Radio International’s “This American Life” show called “Testosterone” last year. It was a fascinating listen.

We just created a new video, "Avoiding Dud Dates After 40" based on real-life experiences I've had with men -- before I even met them! We tried to make t…

A gal pal recently asked me why I thought a man would go poof after expressing great interest in a woman. The obvious answers would be:

• he was a player and said he was very interested in every woman
• something happened for him to lose interest (e.g., she said/did something that was off-putting; he got more interested in someone else; he got busy with work).

However, I think there is another, less commonly discussed possibility:

I’ve been approached by the PR firm for the new movie “It’s Complicated” offering prizes for you, my readers! Additionally, the PR firm for K-Y Brand “Yours+Mine” and “Intense” personal lubricants offered prizes. Plus I’ll add copies of Date or Wait: Are You Ready for Mr. Great? and some Flirt-O-Grams. So we are going to combine the prizes for the winners of the first Dating Goddess contest!

To follow the theme of the “It’s Complicated” movie, the contest will be for the best stories about attraction to a former love. You can write up to 500 words telling us the story of your attraction and what happened (please keep it clean). Write your entry here in a comment. Tell your friends!

The prizes are:

I mean this literally — not are you internally talking yourself out of going on a date.

For example, recently I had two conversations with a new guy. About 30 minutes into the second conversation, I said I needed to get back to work. He asked if I’d like to get together. I said, “Sure, we could meet for coffee. What part of town do you live in?”

He responded that he lived near an upscale shopping center that I like to frequent.

“Great. We could meet there.”

Got a midlife dater (or would-be dater) on your holiday gift list? Want something special that will add value to your loved one's life, not get shoved in a drawer…

You’ve heard people utter this phrase about a hapless dater — or would-be dater. Perhaps you’ve said it yourself after a vexing encounter with a single. And of course, it can be said about either gender.

The speaker usually says it after an unpleasant interaction, or even hearing about someone’s clueless behavior. I thought it myself recently after a potential suitor’s second call, during which this accomplished, intelligent man was argumentative and condescending.

My friend Mike Domitrz is the founder of The Date Safe Project™, and author of May I Kiss You? and Help! My Teen Is Dating. In familiarizing myself with his work, I was taken not only by his commitment to helping kids and young adults to date more respectfully, but with the application of his ideas to midlife daters.

No, I am not going to tell you to wear low-cut tops, skin-tight clothes nor mini-skirts. Although that is hot on some women for some men. But that’s not the tip I want to tell you.

I’m going to share something I’ve stumbled on in my dating adventure. It may be old hat to you. I’ve been surprised at how universal the effect is on most men, even married pals.