Maybe you’re like me and have attended a lot of seminars. Perhaps some of these have been personal-growth workshops. After taking a bunch of them, you realize you can design a lot of the activities yourself. If you are a good student, you see that you don’t really need someone else to design the processes…
Are you ready for Mr. Great?
Even eye candy isn’t good if you’re allergic
Last night, a date and I went to a Halloween party. The room was filled with scantily clad, hard-bodied beautiful people in provocative costumes. I tried to fit in with a comparably sedate, decidedly more understated attempt at a dominatrix. While I felt comfortable in my costume, even with my chubby, fishnet-encased legs flowing from…
Are you sending off “ready” vibes?
Talking to a single friend about her dating life, she said, “I’m really not ready, but I do have a profile posted.” “Why do you have a profile posted if you’re not interested in actually dating right now?” “It puts me in the mood of getting ready.” “That’s wise. It opens you up to the…
The zest test
An attractive, successful, intelligent, sexy 48-year-old man told me on our first date that he’d only had two other dates in the last 3.5 years. I asked why. “I’m not attracted to most women.” This was unusual, as I’d heard that many men are attracted to a lot of women who meet their physical criteria….
Bank of Grace account overdrawn
You met a guy and you seemed to hit it off really well. You saw him a few times. Lots of flirting, which led to hand holding and even kissing. In between seeing each other, some calls. But there were also a lot of unkept promises and missed commitments. There were plausible reasons, so you…
Dating’s emotional roller coaster
Your experience dating your current guy swings from elation to disappointment, glee to frustration, fun to hassle. But the good far outweighs the bad, so you stick with it. When it’s great, it’s really great. It would be easy to complain about — and to — him. But you have to realize you voluntarily climbed…
The faux vacation fling
You had an instant, magical, mutual connection. On the first date you both expressed how attracted you were to the other, and how much you enjoyed your time together. He kissed you on the cheek during dinner, showing that he was a gentleman — not assuming privileges too soon. After dinner, neither of you wanted…
Jumping to conclusions
We’d been seeing each other for a few weeks. We’d hit it off really well and expressed our mutual liking. We’d decided to get together Friday evening for something casual. No definite plans had been made, just that we’d talk that afternoon and see what we wanted to do and when to rendezvous. He called…
“How many sexual partners have you had?”
This is a deadly question to ask someone you’re dating. Whatever he says will be wrong. If he’s had fewer than you think is appropriate, you’ll think he’s inexperienced. If he’s had more — perhaps way more — than you think is acceptable, you’ll think he’s a slut. And what if he asks you? Same…
Cruising at festivals
Our neighborhood is hosting a city-wide Italian festival today, so I decided to use it as an opportunity to cruise for men. After all, we’ve been discussing how hanging out where people you are likely to like in the “real” world (vs. Internet) is a better option. So I wanted to experiment to see if…
Are you open to receiving?
Do you think of yourself as feminine? When I hear that word, I think of the terms usually used to define the word: delicacy, prettiness, sensitivity, gentleness, compassion. I conjure up an image of a demure, eyelash-batting, quiet girl/woman wearing pink lace and crinolines. A la Melanie Hamilton, Scarlet’s rival in “Gone With the Wind.”…