How does a man earn “boyfriend points” with you? Does he get points when he calls, takes you out, says nice things, brings you flowers? How about opens the door, helps with your coat, takes you to your favorite restaurant, compliments you, plans fun activities? Or acts with integrity, is kind to strangers, pets dogs…
Real deal or faux beau
Meet the … kids!
The film “Meet the Parents” showed how nerve wracking it can be to meet your sweetie’s parents. Well, how about when you meet his kids? That can be similarly unnerving, since if they don’t like you it can strain the relationship. I had the opportunity to meet my beau’s kids this week. At least two…
Do you love how he loves you?
Do you know how you want to be loved? What if a man loves you, but not quite the way you want to be loved? Will you stick with him, thinking that you can teach him how you want to be loved? Has that worked? I’ve been fortunate enough in my 2.5 years of dating…
“I don’t want a whipped boyfriend”
These words were uttered by my neighbor’s 16-year-old daughter as we were discussing dating. The three of us were sharing the nice things men we dated had done for us when she blurted this out. I was surprised, as I didn’t think any of the examples we shared would be considered signs of a man…
Falling in …????
You’ve begun to date a guy you like. Each encounter makes you like him more. He’s funny, thoughtful, smart, romantic. He cares about making you happy. He’s not self-absorbed. He sends you sweet, caring emails and gives you sincere compliments. You find yourself falling in…??? What? What is this? Like? Are you falling in like?…
Is he a “soft place to fall”?
Dr. Phil uses the term “a soft place to fall” to express a safe space to be vulnerable. He frequently asks troubled couples if they each provide a soft place to fall for the other. When you’ve dated a guy for a little while, do you feel you can be vulnerable with him, admitting your…
Do your activity preferences match your guy’s?
Are you clear on how much you like to weekly participate in activities with a sweetie? How much alone time do you want/need? How much time do you want weekly/monthly to spend with your friends and/or family without him? And when you’re with your guy, optimally how many times a week do you want to…
Having a SNORgasbord with your sweetie
You’ve been dating the same guy for a while. You’ve decided it is time to have a sleepover. You follow the rules set forth in “Sleepover do’s and don’ts.” You’re snuggled in his arms, loving the closeness. You begin to drift to slumberland until … he starts snoring in your ear. And not just a…
What melts your heart?
We all dream of someone who melts our heart. And when he does or says those liquefying actions or words, his flaws seem to dim. We are drawn to him more. We feel ourselves rising a bit more towards love. What are not just things you like, but things that make your heart soften? Are…
How to introduce your midlife flame to colleagues?
My sweetie and I were talking about a function we will be attending with his professional colleagues. He asked, “How shall I introduce you to my associates and co-workers? What shall I call you? I want to tell them of our relationship when I introduce you as my — what?” We wanted to use the…
Why men don’t tell you you’re pretty
Some men tell you they think you are attractive on the first or other early dates. Some will never tell you. For two months I dated a man who never said he thought I was attractive. In frustration at his aloofness, one day I said to him, “I don’t even know if you find me…