A DG reader sent this question: Any ideas on how to gently let a good man go? I had several dates with a kind, intelligent, respectful man. We had much in common but by the third date it occurred to me that what we had was friendship, not a romantic attraction. He had different feelings…
Tag: dating after forty
Advice from sister-surrogate sages
Having lunch with two friends, both 16 years my senior, we were discussing relationships. They asked about my love life, always wanting an update on the soap opera of my dating situation. One had been married nearly 50 years, the other was a divorcée from a 30-year marriage. I often bounced my relationship dilemmas off…
Even eye candy isn’t good if you’re allergic
Last night, a date and I went to a Halloween party. The room was filled with scantily clad, hard-bodied beautiful people in provocative costumes. I tried to fit in with a comparably sedate, decidedly more understated attempt at a dominatrix. While I felt comfortable in my costume, even with my chubby, fishnet-encased legs flowing from…
Are you sending off “ready” vibes?
Talking to a single friend about her dating life, she said, “I’m really not ready, but I do have a profile posted.” “Why do you have a profile posted if you’re not interested in actually dating right now?” “It puts me in the mood of getting ready.” “That’s wise. It opens you up to the…
The zest test
An attractive, successful, intelligent, sexy 48-year-old man told me on our first date that he’d only had two other dates in the last 3.5 years. I asked why. “I’m not attracted to most women.” This was unusual, as I’d heard that many men are attracted to a lot of women who meet their physical criteria….
Bank of Grace account overdrawn
You met a guy and you seemed to hit it off really well. You saw him a few times. Lots of flirting, which led to hand holding and even kissing. In between seeing each other, some calls. But there were also a lot of unkept promises and missed commitments. There were plausible reasons, so you…
Are you holding on when you should let go?
Have you been in (or perhaps are in) a relationship that the other person isn’t as into? It doesn’t have to be a committed relationship, as this can happen even in dating. You are more into him than he is to you. He indicates this by his lack of calling, initiating outings, or verbally giving…
Dating’s emotional roller coaster
Your experience dating your current guy swings from elation to disappointment, glee to frustration, fun to hassle. But the good far outweighs the bad, so you stick with it. When it’s great, it’s really great. It would be easy to complain about — and to — him. But you have to realize you voluntarily climbed…
Is he collecting data on how to make you happy?
I briefly dated a man who interspersed into our conversations a myriad of questions about my preferences. He asked about my favorite flower, gemstone, color, fabric, musical artist, book genre, movie type, restaurants, foods, thing to do on a sunny day, coffee shop, travel destinations, pet peeves, etc. After a few questions, I asked why…
Sexual desire is alive and well in daters over 50
Alert reader Paulette sent a link to this article, “Sex, Lust And Passion Top Baby Boomer Love Expectations” for us to mull over. According to a study conducted by Wanobe.com, “The Lifestyle Place for Those Over Fifty,” a UK site, singles over 50 are twice as likely as their younger counterparts to have sex on…
Scantily clothed pictures
A gal pal new to online dating asked me: “What does it mean when a man offers to send you scantily clad pictures, and you haven’t even talked to him on the phone yet, let alone met?” “Sex.” “Say more.” “When people want to exchange nearly nude — or even nude — pictures, I’ve found…