I’m amazed when I hear of women who will accept dates with nearly anyone because they feel at least they’ll get a free meal out of it. I have one friend who feels this way. I don’t think it is fair to the man to accept an invitation just for the sake of a meal….
Dating after 40
Honesty is not always the best policy
No, I am not suggesting you lie. I am suggesting, however, that there are times when full honesty is not the best at the time. For example, full disclosure is not always necessary on a first date. I’ve had guys tell me they were still living with their wives, had been adulterers, were being sued…
It’s raining men!
“Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home. I’m tired.” —Mae West One of the beauties of online dating is it seems there is a never-ending supply of suitors. At least that’s my experience. And I have pretty stringent criteria for my matches. Yes, I get 10 times more…
Start with coffee
New online daters have shared that they are concerned about accepting a date with someone and as soon as they meet him, they know he is not a match. If the plan is for dinner, dancing, lunch or hiking, they know the are in for hours of making polite conversation with someone they know is…
The art of consideration
When most guys are starting to woo a woman, they work to make her happy. They do things that they think will show they are considerate and care. They suggest activities they think she’ll like. I’ve dated guys who were very considerate. One said “You pick the movie/restaurant and I’ll pay.” to show he was…
Dating is like house hunting
“He who hesitates is a damned fool.” —Mae West My friend Ken Braly wrote a hilarious piece, “Finding A House, Finding A Spouse” (posted in the Pages section) about how dating is like shopping for a home. I see this parallel. If you are shopping for a new home, you would want to see properties…
No rules for dating after 40
I was sharing my dating life with a married friend. She said she was glad she wasn’t dating now because there are no rules. When she was dating (40 years ago) there were rules. “Like what?” I asked. “No kissing on the first date.” “Really?” I responded incredulously. “I’ve had some fantastic kisses on the…
Dr. Jekyll/Ms. Hyde: Start the date on the right foot
Yesterday a male friend told me how his last date lasted 5 minutes. He’s an affable, considerate, tolerant guy, so I couldn’t imagine what could go wrong in 5 minutes. He said he’d had great, fun, pleasant, in-depth phone conversations with the woman, then asked her to a high-end restaurant for dinner. Nearly immediately after…
Long-distance suitor and the first date
“Absence makes the heart grow fonder— of somebody else.” —Anonymous A man who lives 400 miles away has been flirting with me for months and calls every day. He decided he would fly to my city this weekend to meet me. He’d get a car and a hotel room, so there would be no discomfort…
Hello — goodbye: How to say no thanks after meeting
One of the hardest parts of dating is telling your date that it isn’t a match so you don’t encourage him to pursue you. It is easiest to do in an email, but I only recommend this method if you’ve only met once. Start with thanking him for coffee, lunch, whatever. Comment on some of…
Building your Franken-boyfriend
I’ve fantasized about putting together my perfect man — my Franken-boyfriend. After dating a lot of men, I’ve grown very fond of different parts of many. I’d like to build my perfect man with the beautiful green eyes of one, the height of another, one’s sense of humor, another’s deep, resonant voice, the kindness and…