In sales, when you check for buying interest you use a trial close. Something like, “If you were to purchase this, which color/size/model would you like most?” Or, “If you were to go ahead, how many units would you initially order?” I’ve noticed some guys use a “trial kiss” to check for a woman’s “buying…
Awaiting the equivalent of a prom invitation
I don’t yet have a date invitation for New Year’s Eve. I’m in that dilemma some high school girls talk about where the prom is coming up and there are several possibilities. She really wants to be asked by her top guy, but she may be asked by the beta guy. If the beta guy…
Appreciating the Christmas gifts
No matter what your feelings about Christmas, I think you’d agree that the season — at least in many parts of the world — is focused around giving. It is a time of acknowledgement, in the US starting at Thanksgiving, culminating for many in gift giving on Christmas day, during Chanukah or Kwanzaa. So I’d…
Is your date trainable?
Sometimes I’m asked why I don’t always speak up when a date does something I don’t like. I weigh several things: Do I care enough about this relationship to put effort in trying to improve it? If it is a one-time coffee date with someone I can see isn’t a good match, then I don’t…
Do you get his motor running, or why does he read “easy” on your forehead?
I was chatting with a male friend about why the majority of the “bad” dates listed in “Men behaving badly” involved men moving too fast. We discussed if these guys were just horn dogs or if I was sending off subtle signals that were being misinterpreted. He: How do you behave in pre-meeting phone calls…
Women’s first-date blunders
In “First-date red flags that this guy isn’t for you” I talked about what men do that tell you he should be released back into the dating pool. But I’ve been curious what women do that make a man say, “She’s not for me.” Of course, everyone has their individual deal breakers, so I interviewed…
When “be yourself” is questionable advice
Oft-heard advice to daters is, “Just be yourself.” Well, what if “yourself” isn’t very appealing? What if “being yourself” means showing up for a first date with disheveled hair, dirty, ripped clothes, and uncouth behavior? That’s how you are at home, so isn’t it truly being yourself? On one hand, you shouldn’t try to be…
Men behaving badly
I rarely talk about “bad” dates, because if a date doesn’t work out, it just wasn’t meant to be. No use lingering on what didn’t work or what an unpleasant experience it was. When people hear I’ve written a book about midlife dating (now in my literary agent’s hands to sell), many immediately say, “I…
A different kind of f-buddy
No, I am not referring to the term most commonly associated with the f-buddy phrase. I have a new meaning for f-buddy — flirt buddy! What is a flirt buddy? Someone you can flirt with by email, phone or in person who knows you have no serious intentions. Some of my favorite flirt buddies are…
You can tell a lot by your date’s … driving
I don’t recommend you get in a date’s car until you’ve gone out with him at least three or four times. But when you do, notice how he drives. It will tell you a lot about his personality. Here’s my take on driving habits and what they can tell you. Tailgates — He’s impatient and…
“If you’ve got it, flaunt it!”
This was a favorite saying from my mother. Ironically, she was one of the most prudish women I’ve ever known, so she wasn’t talking about flaunting your physical attributes. However, we are going explore when to do that. You, no doubt, know what of your physical characteristics men find most appealing. You have to decide…