We all dream of someone who melts our heart. And when he does or says those liquefying actions or words, his flaws seem to dim. We are drawn to him more. We feel ourselves rising a bit more towards love. What are not just things you like, but things that make your heart soften? Are…
Don’t send flowers with a kiss-off email
I heard about a service called DumpADate.com. Their tag line is “When it’s time to dump your date.” Now I think this is a dumb concept. It offers a service where you can email or write your intended ex-sweetie and they will deliver the message. What, picking up the phone, writing your own email or…
You have to buy your dating ticket
Some midlife women have shared that they would be interested in dating and finding a sweetie, but they don’t want to do any work to find him. They may — or may not — list themselves on a dating site, but they’re not willing to look at profiles, nor email anyone. If someone approaches her,…
How to introduce your midlife flame to colleagues?
My sweetie and I were talking about a function we will be attending with his professional colleagues. He asked, “How shall I introduce you to my associates and co-workers? What shall I call you? I want to tell them of our relationship when I introduce you as my — what?” We wanted to use the…
When a man tells you what he paid for things
For two months I dated a man who told me what he paid for his Mercedes ($85,000), his Ferragamo shoes ($450), his Persian rug ($1400), his Rolex ($10,000), and his son’s PlayStation ($600), among other items. He was a wealthy man who spent less than $100 total on our weekly dates. This got me wondering…
Being a good Girl Scout in dating
I loved being a Girl Scout. On meeting days I proudly wore my uniform to school and voraciously earned many badges to decorate my sash. Recently, I thought about how The Girl Scout Law affects my dating — and of course, my life philosophy. The Girl Scout Law I will do my best to be…
Make peace with your body parts
Midlife women have shared with me that they didn’t want to start dating until they lost weight and/or got in shape. Some said the thought of getting undressed in front of a man was so unnerving, they would rather not start the dating process if that was to be the end result. In “Getting naked…
“Johnny Are You Queer?”
The other day I was listening to NPR’s Terry Gross interviewing film maker John Waters (Hairspray, Pink Flamingos). Among other things, he discussed his new CD “A Date with John Waters.” It’s a compilation of love songs including “Johnny Are You Queer?” by Josie Cotton. Waters said one of the reasons he included the song…
How does music affect your dating?
Listening to my preferred radio station today, I noticed how many of my favorite songs are love ballads. Not lyrics of heartbreak and disappointment, but songs of deep caring and affection. Okay, I admit it, in addition to Luther Vandross, Marvin Gaye, Toni Braxton, Babyface, Gladys Knight and Michael Bolton, I like tunes by Barry…
Think of dating like the movie “Groundhog Day”
Remember the hilarious 1993 film “Groundhog Day”? Poor Bill Murray‘s character, Phil Connors, repeats the same day — Feb. 2, Groundhog Day — over and over and over again. But he’s aware that he’s reliving it so he begins to do different things each day, at first hedonistically, then he begins to reexamine his life…
Why men don’t tell you you’re pretty
Some men tell you they think you are attractive on the first or other early dates. Some will never tell you. For two months I dated a man who never said he thought I was attractive. In frustration at his aloofness, one day I said to him, “I don’t even know if you find me…