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Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40™

Dating-over-40 advice by the Dating Goddess™

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Should you seek feedback on why it didn’t work out?

Posted on April 27, 2007 by Dating Goddess

I’m sometimes asked why my multi-week relationships didn’t work out. If the guy released me, I don’t really know so can only guess. I’ve been asked, “What did the guy say when he broke up with you?” The truth is, most of them have just gone poof, even after seeing each other 5-7 weeks. Very…

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Review of “I Love You, Let’s Meet”

Posted on April 26, 2007 by Dating Goddess

I was introduced to I Love You, Let’s Meet through alert reader Elena who posted the link to the video in a comment. I thought the video humorously captured what happens far too often with online dating — you become enamored with someone through emails, IMs and phone calls. Then you meet, and nothing. No…

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Is he crazy — or are you?

Posted on April 25, 2007 by Dating Goddess

They fell quickly and hard. Within 2.5 weeks of meeting, they were exchanging I love yous. They spent every weekend together and most weekday nights. They were sure they’d found their soul mates. The sex was frequent and fantastic. Then something shifted. They started fighting frequently. She was often late to their assignations — sometimes…

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Do men want feisty women?

Posted on April 24, 2007 by Dating Goddess

I’ve recently become addicted to “Dancing with the Stars.” I know, I’m slow to join the onslaught of rabid fans. What pushed me over the top was Apolo Anton Ohno. What a luscious man! Although he’s only 24, one can still drool, yes? I got so enamored, I spent the evening watching this season’s previous…

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Does he want a “mommy”?

Posted on April 23, 2007 by Dating Goddess

Some midlife women complain that some men they’ve dated want someone to take care of them — a mommy. Of course, in a Oedipal twist, they also want her to perform in the bedroom, assuming he still can. Being a mother figure isn’t all bad if that is what you like. Many women like nurturing…

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Are you too picky?

Posted on April 22, 2007 by Dating Goddess

A friend chided me, “You’ve gone out with 75 men in 2 years. Why aren’t you married? Are you too picky?” When midlife women share that they haven’t found their “one” and they’re getting tired of looking, they begin to wonder if they are being too picky. The dilemma is, should you continue to be…

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The first fight

Posted on April 21, 2007 by Dating Goddess

New relationships frequently end over a first fight. Sometimes there isn’t even an actual fight, but one of you says/does/doesn’t do something that upsets the other and it’s over — without a word ever being a said about it. So a first fight is important. Not that I’m encouraging you to pick one, but when…

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Does dancing skill equal lovemaking prowess?

Posted on April 20, 2007 by Dating Goddess

In “Dirty Dancing,” we are seduced by Patrick Swayze’s dance moves. He is so smooth, so sexy, so hot. We long for a man who moves like that, who is so sure of himself and knows how to move with us in perfect union. But was he as good in intimate situations as he was…

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When to remove your online profile?

Posted on April 19, 2007September 25, 2008 by Dating Goddess

You’ve been dating your guy for a little while — perhaps 1-3 months. You like him a lot and he seems to like you similarly. You have no interest in seeing anyone else, and he says he isn’t seeing anyone else. He asks you what he says to men who email you, and you say,…

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Waves are like people

Posted on April 18, 2007 by Dating Goddess

My sweetie has taken me to a romantic 2-day beach retreat. Our hotel room is 30 feet from the water’s edge. It is beautiful to watch the turbulent ocean dance outside our door. There are two rocks off shore but near the beach. The breakers wrap around each outcropping and come together on the beach…

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Have you stayed just because of the sex?

Posted on April 17, 2007 by Dating Goddess

When midlife daters have shared about their unfulfilling multi-month or -year relationships, I’ve asked why they stayed. After complaining about their former sweetie’s selfishness, immaturity, miserliness, controlling, and/or downright meanness it seems to me you’d be a fool to stay in this relationship. I’m astonished when I hear a commonly cited reason for staying: “The…

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